|Posted on October 6, 2020 at 7:55 PM|
It's so hard missing Ben. I wish he was here for all the little things. The daily things. All the little moments that fill my day. I got new glasses today. I moved my RRSP to a new bank. I had caesar salad for lunch- is my breath garlicy? I'll catch up on laundry tomorrow. Do you want to go for a walk? You don't realise how many moments add up in a day. How many moments I miss him.
It's constant. That's why I live in the mix of joy and sorrow.
I have a wonderful, beautiful life surrounded by loving friends and family. I have a house and the best cat in the world, Mia. I am grateful every day for these simple (yet big) things. It's in between that creates so much exhaustion. It's the yo-yo of up and down - those wonderful little things followed by the cold realities: you aren't here to admire my new glasses. You aren't here to talk about bank rates. You aren't here to check my breath or help with the laundry and I don't want to take the walk alone.
Categories: Peace & Love